Virginia Lawyers Weekly

It’s been more than 23 years since my last drink of alcohol.

Frequently, when a member is asked to lead discussion at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, the speaker reflects on “What life was like… what happened… what is life like now.” Today, I am grateful for the opportunity to share my experiences as an attorney who was an active alcoholic – how I eventually sought help, why I decided to get help, and what my life is like today as an alcoholic in recovery.

Members of the therapeutic community define addiction as the repeated, compulsive seeking or use of a substance despite adverse social, psychological and/or physical consequences. Addiction to alcohol is a progressive, incurable and fatal disease.

The progressive nature of the disease means that the illness never gets better without treatment. I am very fortunate that in 1986 two former law partners initiated an intervention that lead me to enter Father Joseph C. Martin’s Ashley, an inpatient treatment facility for alcohol addiction located in Maryland.

At the time of my intervention, I had no concept of alcoholism and certainly no idea that I was an alcoholic. I did not know about Father Martin’s reputation or what to expect during my 28-day stay at Ashley. To be honest, my initial purpose in agreeing to be taken away from my family and job for a month was simply to get my partners off my back with the hope that maybe I would learn how to drink! When I completed my treatment, my hope was to return to my family and my law practice without living with the compulsion to drink. The simple truth is that Father Martin and his remarkable staff, through education and love, saved my life and gave me the tools through the program of Alcoholics Anonymous to live a full and productive sober life.

Unlike so many others, my drinking behavior did not involve DUI arrests, drunken or disorderly conduct, job termination, threat of bankruptcy or loss of family through divorce. I was simply addicted to alcohol and could not stay sober on my own, regardless of how hard I tried. I could not understand why my attempts to control my drinking never worked. I was intelligent, successful and seemed to be in control of other aspects of my life. I kept asking why I couldn’t drink like other people. I’d switch from drinking hard liquor to beer, from beer to wine limiting myself to just two glasses – big glasses – of wine a day. Finally, one morning I came face to face with my problem as I poured vodka into my room service orange juice. During the next five years I made promise after promise that I was not going to drink that day. What I needed was a good recovery program and a little help from God.

One of the relentless elements of the disease of alcoholism is “denial.” It is a disease that tells you that you don’t have it. Most alcoholics, including myself, are the last person to know. During my 28 days at Ashley I learned a lot about alcoholism and recovery. Most importantly, I came to understand that I was suffering from a genuine disease – not from a lack of willpower or a weak backbone. I accepted that fact based upon all of the evidence that was presented to me. Father Martin, who recently died at 84, achieved an international reputation as a leader in the fight against alcoholism and substance abuse when he produced his famous film “Chalk Talk.” Produced initially for the U.S. Navy’s alcohol treatment program, this film describes the effects of alcohol on the brain. While I studied the interplay of alcohol on brain chemistry in college, it was Father Martin who brought the lesson home. During treatment at Ashley and again at a meeting of the Virginia Bar Association, I heard Father Martin deliver his signature lecture “Chalk Talk.” Father Martin made the complicated seem simple and recovery seem possible and he fostered in me a strong desire to help other suffering alcoholics. During his lectures he would ask, “How far do you go to save the life of an alcoholic? You go as far as you can and then one step more.” Finally, having accepted my own alcoholism, I began to follow the prescription for recovery offered at Ashley.

The 12-step Alcoholics Anonymous recovery program – often referred to as a simple program for complicated people – served as the foundation for my path to recovery and a promise for a new way of life.

After returning home from Ashley, as if on cue, I learned about Lawyers Helping Lawyers (LHL), a peer-support group sponsored by the VBA, which counsels judges, lawyers and law students on substance abuse. The significance of finding LHL comes from my understanding of the 12th step of Alcoholics Anonymous which suggests “Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.” Or more simply put, we carry the message of hope and recovery to other alcoholics.

Today life is good. This summer my wife and I will celebrate our 39th wedding anniversary with our three adult children (two are married and our youngest will be married in October) and three grandchildren. In 2007, my business partner of 22 years and I started our own law firm and our practice is thriving despite today’s challenging economy. My work in LHL has helped to keep me sober, for which I am grateful. However, the true miracle of the last 23 years, however, is the absence of the compulsion to drink and the resulting serenity and freedom that I experience every single day.

David S. Mercer is a principal with MercerTrigiani, a real estate law firm serving community associations throughout Virginia and Washington. Mr. Mercer also serves on the board of directors for Lawyers Helping Lawyers. For more information on recovery, visit www.valhl.org.

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